Lindsey...

...needs Mark now.  Seriously.

And...

How could I have updated my blog without mentioning my BFF?

I got very emotional yesterday because I realized that I have the best friend in the world and I'm very lucky that he's in my life. We watched Will and Grace over the phone yesterday, which was completely us...and made me very thankful.

Vacay, Camp, Vacay Away!

Had a great summer vacation, which consisted of a trip to Portland to see Markie, then a trip to Seattle for Tallis Scholars camp, then back to Portland for more vacation.  And now I'm back in Columbia to finish my life here (I move in about a week).

So, trip stories.  I'll give the highlights, the abridged yet no-less humorous version.

Thursday: Fly to Portland.  Am greeted by my BFF with a game of Marco Polo in the baggage claim and a snickers bar.  Enjoy a nice pinot at a wine bar--great weather.  Snuggle in bed--really missed that.

Friday: Eat sushi on a train (the sushi was on the train, not us) and "Hike" around town to Rose Gardens and Japanese Gardens.  "Hike" was quite literally a balls-to-the-walls 45 degree angle kind of hike, which I did in a skirt.  Watched "Crash" on a projector outside.  "Crash" is dumb, and I'm the only person in the world who thinks so.

Saturday: Drive to Seattle.  Start Tallis Scholars camp.  Meet a bunch of crazies, which includes the Tallis Scholars.  SO EXCITED!

Sunday: A little worried that camp will be a bust because most people are not as good as I had hoped.  But they are dang nice and I continue to be positive.  Discovered that Seattle is a huge early music hub.  Tudor choir, cool!

Monday: Start to become suspicious of the crazy lady with her Asian daughter (Les and Lili).  Suspicions confirmed upon conversation with Mark and a few colleagues about the awkwardness of their relationship.  Singing in a small group with Big Mark and company.  Meet some amazing singers, especially Erika.  I REALLY like to sing with her.

Tuesday: My lesson with Jan Coxwell.  Goes really well.  Great advice; I really respect her.  Sing in the mass service at St. James, and the choir turns around--they sound pretty good!  Catered BBQ afterwards, and Mark and I take full advantage of the open bar.  We go out with the scholars to get a drink and I learn to love Patrick Craig.  We decide that Mark and I are Will and Grace and he and Jan are Will and Karen.  Jan is excited that she's the drunk one.

Wednesday: Free day in Seattle.  Mark and I walk to Pike's Market, then to Nordstrom Rack and buy shoes.  We huff and puff our way to Pioneer Square, and then literally run up the steepest hike back to the University for a rehearsal.  I thought I was going to die.  Very reminiscent of our hostel in Nice... But Mark was a good friend about it and waited for me every five feet when I stretched out my calves.

Thursday: Small Group Sharing Concert.  Every single person there psyched themselves out.  Our amazing small group bombed, and I'm still very sad about it.  Mark and I learned we need more mental preparation before we sing Tallis.

Friday: We heal our egos in time for the Gala concert.  But my ego suffers another blow when Jan tells me I'm sharping my high notes on her piece.  I develop a huge complex, which almost ruins my outlook on life.  Later she senses I'm freaking out and calms me down, so I performed pretty well in the concert.  At Compline, Sam and I spy on Les and Lili (as imitated below), having another awkwardly inappropriate mother-daughter moment.  We all go to the after

 party with an open bar and karaoke and Mark and I steal the show with our drunkenness.  As we always do.  

Saturday: We have an informal photo shoot with the Tallis Scholars and our friends, check-out, then eat lunch on the roof of Andrew's condo.  Mark and I go shopping for hats in Seattle, and then we all drive back so Mark can practice for his church audition.  An evening full of crappy hymns.  SERIOUSLY CRAPPY hymns.

Sunday: Mark's audition at the Unity Church.  He does great.  I sing for him at communion and lick the bread before I dip, which upsets the hippies.  Afterwards a hot Asian lesbian hits on me and wont leave me alone--I somehow get her phone number.  What am I going to with it?  Mark and I vintage shop and get crepes and eat leftover Chinese food outside while we talk about all kinds of things (namely spirituality and the absurdity that the Life Sciences Building covers up the telescope in the Astronomy department at MU).

Monday: Trip to Wine Country.  Mark and I get thoroughly drunk and buy six bottles of wine.  We stop in a McDonalds on the way back for chicken sandwiches and Will and Grace.  We go out on the town back in Portland and get lost for about an hour, then eat Italian and drink at a gay bar.  We meet a crazy gay who helps usher Mark in to the gay club scene, but also lectures Mark about devotion (the most vague and undefined word in existence).

Tuesday: The tearful goodbye.  Really tearful.  A tear-filled MAX ride to the airport, a tear-filled check-in...  Really nice :)

Were there lessons learned?  Every trip has to have lessons learned.  So here they are:

1) The only thing the Tallis Scholars love more than singing Renaissance music is getting shit-faced and singing Karaoke at shady bars.

2) The best way to get "noticed" in the music world is to be humble and talented.  No one needs to talk themselves up as much as they do.

3) Good friends are hard to find, but easy to keep (I'm sure that's on a bookmark somewhere).

Transitions

It's very weird and unsettling to be in a transition right now.  I'm here in Columbia, just kind of hanging out and waiting to start my new life in Bloomington.  I'm leaving in less than a month (and spending a week and a half out west) and I don't have any time to move FORWARD.  So I'm just here, wasting time until the next portion of my life starts.  It's kind of upsetting.  Mark always calls with stories about his new life and I'm so excited for him, but he's moving forward and I'm just waiting.  By myself.  It's a weird feeling.

It's like, the only emotions I have time for right now are excitement and sadness.  I'm excited about the future, but so sad about what I'm leaving behind.  

Apparently Mark is eating tofu coconut smoothies.  Who is my friend?  It's weird that he's already started a new life.  Kind of depressing for me as I sit on my ass and watch Will and Grace by myself.

But don't feel bad, readers (I'd be lucky if there were two of you).  Tonight I made a good dinner and mixed lemonade with iced tea and picked myself up.

Filling the Void

So Mark moved out. He officially left our parking lot at 5:15 yesterday evening with a car filled to the brim with everything that "made the cut." His move was long, tedious, emotional, difficult, and wonderfully fulfilling at the same time. As a result, I was a schizophrenic mess when he left, which could only be quelled by my anti-gay-but-kind-of-gay-best-non-gay-guy-friend Neil (Neil, by the way, is NOT anti gay as in "I'm gonna kill me some gays today," but anti-gay in his "I'm obviously a top" macho-ness). We cooked, drank, ate, drank, talked, drank, played wii, and drank, all of which were very straight-gay activities that helped me deal with the passing of my gay-gay best friend.

I spent today by myself in my mess of an apartment, trashed with Mark's leftover belongings he tossed aside while packing when he realized his little Prism wouldn't hold it all. I spent much of the day wandering around and avoiding cleaning up the multitude of unorganized piles. I straightened my hair, edited my recital mp3s, discussed moving logistics with my mother, warmed up leftover salmon... And after stuffing my brain with as much Bravo reality tv as I could take, I decided to deal with the loss of my beloved gay in a 

more proactive manner.

When your best friend packs up and heads off on the Oregon Trail to pursue an unknown career on the west coast and return indefinitely, it's easy to fall into a state of zombie-like shock. But I caught myself early, dried my eyes, made a craft-run to Walmart, and watched Kathy Griffin while crafting. As this was a favorite activity for me and Markie Jean, it seemed an appropriate homage to him. Since the beginning of time, I have been stealing the book covers from the bulletin board on the top floor of Ellis Library that have ANYTHING to do with music and I have been hoarding them in my room while I wait for an idea of how to use them. I found a stack of unused picture frames Mark left behind, and an idea popped into my head--why not crop the book covers and frame them, to be used as a decoration in my Bloomington apartment! It seemed like a unique idea--framing a bunch of visually interesting covers from a bunch of boring music books. So I did it. And to up the interest, I used different frames and I'll hang them seemingly unordered.  After literally hours of cutting, rubber cementing, and centering, I ended up with 10 cropped covers and a sense of accomplishment.  

Mark would be proud.  Critical...but proud.

Options Schmoptions

I got a new schmoption today: I got accepted to BU's Early Music Program.
I'm pretty sure I'm not going to go there, whether or not I get accepted into NEC. The reasons? a) they're not giving me any money; b) BU is not as prestigious as NEC or Indiana; c) BU doesn't really have any great early music ensembles--instead, they collaborate with Boston Baroque; d) they don't have any early music voice teachers.
BUT, it's another option. I'm not sure yet. Of course, I never visited BU when I went to Boston. Maybe I should have done that...

ps: Mark and I got accepted into the Tallis Scholar's summer program! I will FINALLY be working with Janet Coxwell, whom I have been stalking (to her knowledge) for at least a year.

Bed, Bahamas, Boston

I'm in a weird mood.
I thought I would be going to bed, but I'm not. It's three in the morning and I don't want to go to bed.
My vacation was weird. I liked it and had a really fun time, but it was stressful. One of the most amazing moments was when Mark and I were throwing our suitcases down to Ryan and Jen from the balcony of our crappy hotel because we were trying to escape without the timeshare people knowing. If you understand that, you get a gold star.
And I still haven't heard from NEC. What is taking them so long? When will I be able to make a decision about my life?
I get depressed late at night after I've been traveling...

Death to COMP

The COMP music festival is done. I think it went pretty well, and Dr Freund seemed pretty pleased. However, I just got a pissy email from Dr. Platt about how I'm dumb and a poor worker, which just pissed me off. It pissed me off enough to write a top-five countdown of the reasons why I dislike him. But I just deleted it because I thought it was immature.

A week from yesterday Mark and I will be in New York, at the Met (by the way, Peter Grimes was really good today in HD). And a week from tomorrow, we'll be in the Bahamas with Ryan and Jen. Ryan and I have professed that we will be drunk literally every second of the trip. I hope this is true. I haven't been drinking much lately. I called Mark last night to ask him to pick me up a drink on his way home, but he didn't care about me enough to indulge me.

Battle of the Blogs

Today I walked in on Mark and found him blogging. It's always a little scary to walk in on Mark because he could be masturbating (in fact, that's a high probability). But today his door was cracked open slightly, signaling either A) it was okay to come on in, or B) he was masturbating and forgot to close the door. But, he was blogging. Not a cool, fun, bitchy blog...but a mormon friendly family blog that masks his real identity. I don't know how I feel about that. I, personally, would like a record of my witticism, which, indeed, is NOT mormon friendly. Let's see whose blog is the best in this BATTLE OF THE BLOGS!

Today I have to go to campus and work on this COMP stuff. My job is dumb and I'm not particularly good at it: it's all about communication with people I don't know, and organization, which are two of my weaknesses. Everyone knows I'm bad at it, too. So, I'm kind of a joke around the office. I like not telling Tina and Susan I'm there, so maybe I can catch some gossip about me through the office walls (this, by the way, HAS happened). The biggest issue in COMP right now is getting the judging done for the contest. But, on top of this, this corporate PR bitch named Bridgette keeps calling me. INCESSANTLY! She's quite a whore.  I've gotten her off my case for the past few days. Let's see if today's meeting with my boss erases her from my life forever. 

Last night Mark and I split a bottle of wine and then pretty much fell asleep. It was nice--being drunk for about 45 minutes and then immediately losing all control of consciousness. I had a bad dream about a bitch in a hostel in Holland who got mad at me for ducking under a curtain instead of pushing it aside when I walked through it. That's dumb.